What I needed to hear
I have been a slow reader for a few years now. It's just life that gets in the way, isn't it. I would sit down with a book, and within 5 minutes I need to go to the bathroom, then notice I hadn't finished doing my dishes, the cat wants to crawl on my tummy. I'm lucky if I'm reading an e-book when the cat comes, there's at least some chance of multitasking. If it's a print edition - no way. And I was struggling, it felt like I was missing out on reading.
But then I thought, I'd give audiobooks a go. I had noticed it was mentioned more and more in the media and socials. And I really wanted to read Richard Osman's The Thursday Murder Club.
I had tried audiobooks a long time ago and had found that I drift off in my own thoughts and then I can't even remember where I left off. But this time, I guess for a good audiobook two factors have to be good - the story and the narrator. If one is missing, we're back to the drifting off.
The Thursday Murder Club is narrated by Lesley Manville. She is perfect for this book. She embodies the characters so well, giving them all the layers and tones. Instead of drifting off in my thoughts, I find myself listening to the book whilst doing my dishes, and in my head I'm walking with Joyce through a Kent village. Or sitting in a room with Elizabeth, eating cake and drinking tea. It does help, I think, that I also have been to Kent, and I have actually lived for a very short time, but still, in a small English village. I know the situation with the buses and I remember the high street shop settings.
I hadn't expected to giggle so much in a murder book, and feel so uplifted by the twists and turns wherever they took the characters. The realistic relationships and the tenderness that embodies the understanding of tragedies and the reactions to those. I didn't expect to have a little laugh or to get sympathetically sad whilst sitting on a tram with my headphones on whilst the characters are going through a new discovery of events.
And then came the biggest surprise of them all! The audiobook has a little interview with Richard Osman at the end of it. He talks about the inspirations for characters, admits to some form of his own life in them. He talks about himself as a reader and says things about not believing in good writing from people who don't read. The way he speaks about his characters, it's so endearing and so real. And somewhere in that interview it struck me.
I always have been a poet. Since I was a teenager. A poet who writes poems, some based on my life, some based on observations, some inspired by politics or current events.
But I have always carried a prose story inside me. For at least 10 years now, maybe more. Every time I had tried to write it, it had turned out just total shit, and I'd leave it be for another few years. But listening to the open and enthusiastic way that Osman talks about his characters, how they almost help him write his books, I realised that I had been going on about my story the wrong way around. I had been trying to write about the characters in my head, not writing the characters that live in my head on paper. Listening to what they say and how they feel. What would they do. How would they react. And I knew that is what I needed to do as well. If I get stuck, I'd just ask one of my characters to explain it. My first draft is slowly, but coming together. As Terry Pratchett had said: "The first draft is you telling the story to yourself", and I am finally ready to listen.
(Yes, I know, I know, this is not the Book3 Project that I've been hyping lately. But as the Book3 Project is mostly written already, it's going through the finding the design, the building of its own website, all the magical things that my designer does to make it real, I have some time on my hands to immerse in new writing.)
So, be brave and give Richard Osman's book a chance!
And keep an eye out for the new and amazingly different Book3 Project coming to all your screens soon enough.
Add a commentdef a bug
I've discovered a serious flaw in the universe: no matter how many new summer clothes I buy, the weather doesn't seem to get better.
What do poets do on staycation
Forget going to Paris to write in café's with all sorts of traditional pastries (and I can't really drink a lot of coffee anyway). Especially when the poet in question also does spoken word, aiming for rap, playing the piano and the bass. The best place to be is where all the gear is, y'know.
I have spent the weekend mostly writing, some house work, some just doing nothing.
Today I finally felt like getting my yoga mat out to spend some time on it. That was after I did so much vocal practice that all words stopped making sense to me and became just an alphabet soup, but made of sounds.
It's raining outside.
Red dot by this date
I want to mark this date, err, I believe it is currently the 11th of March 2026, and I have been outside in sandals for the first time (this year).
Granted, it was only to take the bins out and to get the (fresh) cat litter from the pick up box point thing. But every little counts, especially after this brutal and extra long winter.
Important news
I got another tattoo!
And found out that it's been nearly 5 years since the last one. At least according to Hell cz records.
Joking aside
When I go to the office, I feel like jumping on the table and saying:
"Any of you fucking pricks get me sick, and I'll execute every mother fucking last one of you!"
Faced with myself
I've been playing Clues by Sam daily for a week or so now. If anything, the results show my absolute zero patience levels. But since me and Neighbour compare results every day, maybe I will learn at least a tiny bit over time.
One can dream.
The magic of the potato salad
I've been working on a new poem with a slightly new concept. I was really stuck with it. And then I decided to make potato salad.
Now, the salad is almost ready, and I have an amazing idea for the poem.
Tbh, you wouldn't believe how much of my creative work has happened thanks to the potato salad making ritual.
I am also abnormally glad that potatoes don't have too much Nickel in them.
Allocated achievements
I have a built in wardrobe in my bedroom. Recently I got a delivery packed in a rather spacious, yet shallow box. I put the opened box at the bottom shelf (so to speak) of said wardrobe.
Furfur is very pleased with herself that she has figured out a way to sit in a box and be in a shelf at the same time!
Her little face was beaming with pride when she first discovered this.
I presume this is how a lot of CEOs feel. However, they tend to lack the adorableness required.
Help pain with more pain
I went to physio today.
Me getting dressed after the session: is this going to hurt this much every session?
Therapist: we'll see.
Me: OK.
Therapist: you do want me to help you, don't you?
Me: Yeah.
Therapist: then there will be some pain. you'll have to just withstand it for a while.
Me: **sighs** ok.
As I was leaving the room
Me: thanks for all the pain! see you soon.
Therapist: I'll remember that! I will! and next time I won't hold back, there will be more pain!
Me: OK. **closes the door behind me**
Certain levels
These days I have found myself editing unfinished poems with the metronome app open and flashing next to the notebook.
However, choosing the bpm is not as easy as one might think.
But it seems to be leading me towards experimenting with polyrhythmic flows. And that's a new level of fun and frustration.
Sudden realisations
Recently I've been thinking that maybe getting an FM synth is a bit OTT and irrational after all. Maybe the sensible thing to do is to get a bass instead.
Updated hardware makes one v pleased
When I got my Shure mic, I also had to get an audio interface, as there's no way to plug in an XLR mic into a computer directly. Back then I went with the obvious beginner choice - UMC22.
The thing was frustrating. It doesn't have its own drivers, so I had to use asio4all. Those highjack all the computer's sound, which was extremely annoying, as I'd have to unplug the interface to listen to something - be it my recording in the speakers, be it instructional youtube vid, or to practice my vocals along to the music they are meant for. It drove me nuts and my Shure was just collecting dust.
So, I decided to upgrade to something with actual drivers - Motu M2.
Now I have an external sound device that all my sound goes through - input and output. Music and recording stuff, as well as my everyday listening.
I must say, this is v satisfying.
Oh Polymer, Polymer.
I've spent a few weekends on/off playing with Bitwig's Polymer. I think I'm finally on to a sound that goes together with the proj currently titled Aperture 1.4.
The levels of satisfaction in my brain are dizzying :D
And I haven't written nor recorded a single note just yet. Just been fiddling about with sound designing :D
P.S. Not to be a downer to myself, but it still needs to pass the 'see if I feel the same way about it tomorrow' test.
And on this day
I was today years old when I found out about galloping as a rapping flow. O_O
Now I just need to find a video that explains it for especially thick people (being me atm). Which seems to be harder than it sounds (no pun intended, but I'll leave it in).
Another thing on my mind lately about my voice is that I often sound sarcastic or even snarky (the 'ar' pronounced as the posh long 'ɑː' and dropping the 'r'.). Generally speaking, I like the way I sound. However, it can create certain misunderstandings, when I meant what I said genuinely at face value, but my voice twists it into an unintended irony.
Which also means I'm creating awkward situations for my own self when practicing rapping. As it generally prolongs the sound, so I need to either select a different word, or pull the phrase (or line) out into its own rhythmic thing.
Anyway, saving this link for my own future ref: The Science of AESOP ROCK: Galloping Rap Flow?!
My Playlist 27
I have a playlist with songs for vocal inspiration. As I practice spoken word stuff, it mainly consists of rappers and melodic speaking examples. However, it also includes Sisters of Mercy, Rob Dougan, and Peter Gabriel.
