existential rant nothing to see
I've been thinking lately a lot about life and attitude towards it.
In my defence, I've been watching series about grim reapers talking people out of suicide, and most recently I've started watching the last season of You. So some existentialism was bound to happen.
During the last couple of years, I've been generally following the thought "life is what you make of it. if you don't like it, you can change it." Granted, it implies a certain privilege and access to do so, but lucky for me - I have options.
This line of thinking has also led me to believe that other people who have at least my level of options, if they just whinge and whine about their life, but never do anything to change it, they must like it enough still. Or, whinging is their hobby and they need a constant stream of stuff to whine about. Not judging, I don't care enough.
Now, nobody's life is perfect. Not even the super rich, see Elon who's constantly throwing fits and is getting worked up by people disliking him. Anyway, back to the real world.
The idea of "everyone has a bad day from time to time" is also very close to my heart. Because we all do, even Furfur does. But I'm starting to think that having a bad day here and there is good for me. Those are the days when ideas regarding potential changes come about, or at least stem from.
But lately I've been having these nagging thoughts about how much of it is just in my head. I mean, of course all of it is in there. But what nags me is why.
stuff on telly
Kae: Today I was watching this Korean series and I saw a woman strangling a soldier with a lab grown human intestine.
Neighbour: Such must be their customs.
Kae: No, no, in the series this was a completely new innovation, the first company to be able to grow real and usable human organs in a lab, so it lacks the long standing tradition part to be a custom.
Neighbour: Oh ok, sure. Innovation then.
Kae: And this was on Disney! Not on Netflix!
Neighbour: You mean the Disney that makes kids movies?
Kae: That's the one.
Which leads me to another story.
I've been complaining about my Czech language textbook. It has all the most depressing adult themes in it - how to look for a job, how to write your CV, what to do at the government offices, all those things. In a way, I started to want to switch to textbooks meant for children, at least those might have some animals in it!
Yesterday we started a new lesson in the book. And it's about animated films. I'm overjoyed! Finally something on my level :D
During the lesson, I also found myself saying that watching the Adams Family cartoons as a kid, I learned about diversity and how very different people can complement each other, how they can still care for each other.
things I didn't know
I had no idea what I really am going to miss during the recovery time after dental surgery is going to be seeded bread of all things.
Other random note about the whole ordeal is that sobriety is really messing with my head. I haven't done this much online shopping for years.
I don't know how else to say this
It's easy to get from F minor 1st inversion to F minor 7 chord and immediately go for D minor 7b5, but then what?
subject beatGiveaway
Bandmate: I wrote this bass line today **plays**
Me: wow, that’s a fun one, I like it.
B: yes, I like all the sounds in it. Oh btw, I can give you this drum beat if you want. **plays**
Me: yes, please! **listens some more** yes, yes, yes! I have a [Bitwig] project for it!
B: good. It doesn’t go with this bass, but I thought you might want it.
Me: totally!
Solving mysteries
Sometimes the weird hip pain that won't let me sleep has nothing to do with the state of my joints. sometimes it's a cat's toy I'm sleeping on.
Music has sheets, and sheets need stands
My new hobby has now escalated to the point where I need a music sheet stand. So, I opened my favourite local music related thing shop and found the section for notové stojany.
I did not expect that this is going to spiral into a whole new research I need to do. So many options and details that I had no idea about. How does one choose!
Btw, I am also a proud owner of a Shure mic since the beginning of last month. Which seems to have impacted my blogging frequency. So, here's a snippet from a conversation I had with my Bandmate the other day:
Bandmate: I had a lot of fun creating this **plays me some new music**
Kae: **listens carefully** would you be surprised if I said that I have a poem for this?
Bandmate: No, not at all.
So, after the washing machine has finished the cycle, I need to record this particular poem. Until then, I'll get back to the new world of music sheet stands.
The current political world observation
I hadn’t seen this many articles stating “we stand with Ukraine” for a long time.
So there’s that.
Today
On days when I'm composing, my favourite track / song is the one I'm composing now. I might think it's utter rubbish the next day, but that's tomorrow's problem.
Musical inspirations and the results
I was playing my newest 2 synth piece to my bandmate tonight.
Bandmate: very jazz-ey!
Me: I know, and I don't even like jazz.
Bandmate: so, you listen to techno dude youtube music production lessons, hip hop music for inspiration, and end up composing jazz!
Me: I know, I am disappointed in myself.
* this is the 3rd time I have heard him referring to my (different) piano-synth compositions as "jazz-ey".
One day, one day
One day I'll write a poem about my distain towards the nature phenomenon called 'snow'. But it won't be today.
As I was just outside for about 3 minutes and all I can write atm is:
"I hate this fucking snow
I hate this fucking snow."
And that's not even my OC, that's me paraphrasing Tricky.
More seasonal stuff
My Neighbour dropped by last night for dinner and drinks. He asked if he needs to bring anything and I said no. Then he arrived and opened my fridge to get a couple of beers for us.
Me: oh, just like every year around Christmas time, I turn out to be good at hoarding alcohol.
Neighbour: never change that about yourself!
Reflections and no regrets
It's the end of the year and as it is customary, people tend to reflect on their lives. Over the last year and often even further past. I at times dabble in this practice, but I try not to go overboard with it.
However, a trail of thought today had lead me to remember how a woman once was genuinely surprised to find out that I had never been married. And at our age, too!
So, how did I manage this? Easy.
Principle one: "No" is a legitimate answer to a question when someone asks you do to something.
Will you change your shirt to something smarter? - No.
Will you dig out that tree? - No.
Will you marry me? - No.
I also have used another tactic. This one's a bit more elaborate and the steps to take can vary case by case basis, however when executed in a timely manner it is very effective. I have tested this out multiple times and all were successful. And it's goes like this: break up with them before the subject matter comes up.
Though, I should note that sometimes this tactic needs to be combined with the Principle of No.
So there, something simple and no regrets. Also, cheap (or so I've been told).
Domains and knees
Yesterday I bought a new domain. I had to specifically select just the domain option, no hosting plans. Then I had to explicitly confirm my understanding that buying a domain without adding hosting means that I won't be able to have a website on it.
I wish there was some setting on my user profile level to switch on that I already have a hosting plan elsewhere thankyouverymuch.
As for the knee rehab, that's still going on. These days I seem to be scheduled for my procedure on the same weekdays at the same time as a rather polite older punk dude. We are both usually a bit early. He has a convoluted last name.
Next week is my last week for this electro therapy thing. I am both relieved to be moving on to the next set of physiotherapy, but I'm also going to miss these 25 minutes twice a week being quiet with the punk guy listening to the hum on the clinic.
Today's battle was real
Things to realise on November the 10th - I have forgotten how to put my duvet in the cover.
I mean, I did win in the end, for a result, all that. However, I'm not entirely sure if this counts as remembering how to do this.
